br6in

Most people regulate their emotions daily, and more than half the time, they do so by modifying the expression of emotions in their face, voice, and posture (Gross, Richards, & John, 2006). Given the frequency with which we regulate our emotional expressive behavior, it is reasonable to expect that the individual’s ability in this realm would exhibit important associations with other constructs. The regulation of visible expressive behavior encompasses both up-regulation (amplifying emotional expressive behavior) and down-regulation (reducing emotional expressive behavior).

The ability to regulate emotions reflects variation in how well people adjust emotional responses to meet current situational demands (Gross & Thompson, 2007; Salovey & Mayer, 1990). Equipped with this ability, individuals can aptly modify which emotions they have, when they have them, and how they experience and express them (Gross, 1998). This ability is arguably one of the most critical elements of our emotion repertoire, and it is the focus of the present research.

In two studies, we examined how individual variation in the ability to modify emotional expressive behavior in response to evocative stimuli is related to well-being and financial success.

Study 1 showed that individuals who can best suppress their emotional reaction to an acoustic startle are happiest with their lives.

Study 2 showed that individuals who can best amplify their emotional reaction to a disgust-eliciting movie are happiest with their lives and have the highest disposable income and socioeconomic status.

Why Would Emotion Regulation Ability Increase Well-Being or viceversa?

Philosophers have argued that rational thought and a happy life requires the ability to rein in on emotional impulses (Aristotle, 1884; Solomon, 1993). The ability to modify emotional expressive behavior effectively may help people adapt flexibly to situational demands. Equipped with this ability, individuals might be more successful in communicating attitudes, goals, and intentions that are appropriate in various situations (Keltner & Haidt, 1999) and that might be rewarded and fulfilled. The ability to adapt successfully to situational demands then could be associated with various indicators of well-being and success.

People often attain rewards for conforming to displays rules in various settings. For instance, employees who conform to display rules at work are rated as more effective and are more satisfied and less exhausted than employees who flaunt these rules (Côté & Morgan, 2002; Grandey, 2003). Breaking display rules (e.g., failing to smile at a customer or laughing at a funeral) may have costs, such as social exclusion and punishment. The ability to modify emotional expressive behavior may help individuals maximize social gains and avoid these kinds of costs.

People also tend to affiliate with others who share their social class and, thus, through their social networks, successful people tend to be exposed to similarly successful others (Kalmjin, 1991). This exposure may provide successful individuals with opportunities to learn effective ways to regulate emotions through modeling. For example, a successful manager may learn how to regulate her anger at a subordinate by observing how another manager handles a similar episode of conflict.

Happy individuals with a broad mindset may be exposed to more novel information about how to regulate emotions, and also more readily accept that information. In turn, their abilities to regulate emotions may improve. In support of this proposition, the trait of openness to experience is positively associated with emotional abilities (Mayer, Salovey, & Caruso, 2004), suggesting that exposure to novel situations and acceptance of new information facilitate the development of ability in a given domain.

Why Would Emotion Regulation Ability Decrease Well-Being and Financial Success or viceversa?

People with high emotion regulation ability may be less happy and less successful because of the physiological costs incurred when regulating emotions. Modifying emotional expressions both upwards and downward requires considerable physiological resources, activating the sympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system (Gross, 1998; Gross & Levenson, 1993; Kunzmann et al., 2005). Among those who perform well on laboratory tests that measure these abilities and are particularly well-versed in these strategies, physiological strain may accumulate over time and ultimately reduce well-being and success. In a similar vein, inhibiting emotions increases the risk of coronary heart disease and hypertension (Adler & Matthews, 1994) and prolongs recovery from traumatic events (Pennebaker, 1997). This suggests that individuals with high emotion regulation ability may attain lower well-being and financial success via health problems.

Of course, this can be countered if that person's philosophy is solid, as they can make sense of everything going on, chose the right action (weather to suppress or express that emotion) and not leave with internal conflicts in the process. self-assertiveness/self-responsibility/self-awareness are essential for a healthy self esteem, the health issues are consequences.

While knowing the most effective emotion regulatory strategies is undoubtedly part of successful emotion regulation, it does not guarantee that a person can actually carry out the strategy successfully. If a person poorly executes emotion regulation strategies, the strategies will not have the desired effects on emotion. To illustrate this point, successfully suppressing a fear response requires knowing that one has to hold one’s face and body steady. Knowing this, however, does not guarantee that one will be able to do so when faced with emotionally evocative stimuli, such as the startle used in Study 1. Our research shows that the objective measurement of whether an individual can implement a strategy is critical to assess fully that person’s general ability to regulate emotions.

Individuals with high power may feel that they can express the emotions they feel without regulating them (Gibson & Schroeder, 2002; Hall, Coats, & LeBeau, 2005) and, therefore, fail to invest in developing strong abilities to regulate emotions. Support for this proposition comes from a study that found that customer service employees report stronger pressures to suppress their emotions with people who have power over them (customers and supervisors) than people who have similar amounts of power (co-workers; Diefendorff & Greguras, 2009).

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4175372/

http://atlasofemotions.org is a good mean to baptize your emotions, train them and train your control muscles in the process. or EQ