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https://www.reddit.com/r/enfj/comments/5svksl/anybody_else_constantly_holding_everyone_else_up/

Anybody else constantly holding everyone else up to your own social rules? • /r/enfj

Alex

About that...

Whenever I get a kick in the balls from my so called intuition, my main intention is to do the exact opposite

Fuck intuition

99 percent of it is moron habits rearing their ugly heads where they're not wanted

I want to have it as trigger

whenever i intuite something, do the exact opposite

In spite of that stupid monkey

Razvan

))

Alex

Same with fear

Whenever i feel the tension/anxiety, to that exact thing that triggeres it

Razvan

sure, it makes sense, as its a concept of questining your beliefs and intuition

Alex

I sound like an adrenaline junkie

Razvan

but intuition is not an enemy, it wil and it does help you

it will more when you clean it up

Alex

I'm sure at some point I can better trust my gut

Razvan

exactly

Alex

But until I can trust my conscious self more

Razvan

mhm

Alex

I can't risk handing control over to some monkey pulling at my neurons

Razvan

also, the gut, THAT gut, will be in sync with the rational one, they will always work together, its totally different from now

it's a different feeling

Alex

Maybe mindfulness to see where it comes from

But I've always been more in my head than actually doing

Razvan

yup yup, mindfulness , observe and analyze

Alex

So in my case the best would be to just do it

Razvan

yup

Alex

Observe and analyze after

Razvan

action prompts the most information

was talking w vlad

hes dating

he keeps telling me that one seems desperate/weak

etc

Alex

Dating one

Razvan

so i ask him, did you tell her anything about this?

he says no

Alex

or dating around like a badass

Razvan

yeah, badass

so practically what he does is NOT acting.

accepting intuition and assumptions that stem from her actions.

Alex

y

Razvan

so limited information , limited analysis

Alex

You know, i noticed this at me, so i always want to act

whenever i feel a situation such a this

Razvan

mhm

Alex

I think this is where my revolt towards it erupted

Razvan

the moment you feel you drew a conclusion, sensed an emotion, especially negative, investigate

Alex

I talk to the man, and i find something that leads me isntantly to some conviction

And instead of telling the man,

Yo, look what my monkey mind thinks "that you might be insecure and stupid regarding this issue" It comes from who knows what old experience

Truth or false, its better to say it than being distracted from our talk

and allow it to distance us further, just because im afraid he interprets it poorly

Razvan

its important though to have conflict resolution concepts well grounded

Razvan

as that action, that expression will lead to many

Alex

yeah, thats one of the fears

Razvan

its in the blog / mail

Alex

where will this expression lead

the uncertainty of the unknown

Razvan

Y, its temporary

the more you apply , the more you learn

youll get more self confidence to solve any conflict and to express yourself in a way you like,

just like any other skill

Alex

All this possible shit unveils and will never resolve itself in certainty because I never express it

Razvan

and draws u further from reality

not necessarily that you didnt intuit it

but because you can never be sure, you cant exclude the other possibilities

it consumes you

Alex

y

and i get to chew on all of them

until i get depleated of mental energy

Razvan

the fog brain does it more than anything

Alex

and i throw them, someeday maybe

Razvan

and we are not always aware he does,

but the poor thing is slaving away on that crap

Alex

and it keeps bugging me of something left unfinished,

it s sad

Razvan

mhm

if you think of a team, in a corporation

Alex

and its so liberating to say it

Razvan

its like one of the members, lets say the manager, is incompetent

he schedules things wrong, prioritizes the wrong

Alex

yea, good analogy

Razvan

gotta fix that cog

and heh

the idea is not to function super ideal magical

the idea is not to block the process

as this is what currently happens

things literally get stuck

its like a team like this, that keeps switching projects, with a success rate of 30 40%

and instead of handling the dumb manager,

they look for external solutions, new techniques and tools

its like a bias, nepotism

leave him be, he is one of ours,

he is our blood, we can make it work

))

Alex

:)))

Razvan

u gotta kick his ass

Alex

my gray matter is hired on bias, its a cousin of the hypothalamus

Alex

Fmm

Razvan

but its not anyones fault, culture leads to it,

you have no reason to hate ur gray matter

Alex

At least the lizard brain knows what it's doing

Picking up their slack

Razvan

u gotta help it grow

as you cant have a transfer or hire someone new

its like having a child

you cant throw him away and get a new and improved one

Alex

Find the way to make it work

Razvan

u take it slow

life long process

btw

u on reddit ?

its a good environment to express urself n growth

vlad just did

Alex

he gave me a link

in which i saw you commenting at some fears people have

Razvan

hes the op

Alex

dunno if i have an account, but its already too much info

as , its his post ?

Razvan

mhm

Alex

Op with those 10 p

Naiss

Razvan

its not about information, its about a training ground

an environment to work, to express yourself

read less, write more kinda thing

Alex

Aaha

Razvan

analize their shit, and fuckem up

Alex

makes sens

Razvan

mhm

its essential

Alex

K, I'll put it on the list then

Razvan

its like going to a course of expression / assertiveness on the conceptual side

stay on INTp INTj

there are a lot of thugs that will question your concepts+

you gotta learn to express yourself accurately, receive criticism, managing getting triggered, etc

Alex

And try to be authentic

Razvan

try ?

be, always , default

Alex

I find it hard

Razvan

well its redit

Alex

Ca exemplu cu ne spusu omului

Prejudecata mea

Razvan

its the easiest to be here, if not here, then where

Alex

Tru

Razvan

and it will be easier once you see everybody doing it

Alex

I got no exp here

Razvan

and exaggerating at it ))

or hey, see with what you want to start

for ex INFJ

gave u that link

these guys will prioritize harmony .. so unauthenticity

maybe this will motivate you to speak out

when you see someone saying crap, and everyone supporting him emotionally ..

Alex

y

That always gets me goin

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